*sigh*....

 

So i report to Khatib Camp. The Artillery camp, aka Home of the Gunners. I had a huge culture shock when i rocked up to my bunk. It was like bmt, only worse! 8 of us were to share one room about half the size of my bunk in bmt, and the place was dusty and filled with armies of dust bunnies! Worst still, the toilets on our floor was the asian squatting ones, no toilet bowls!!! Seriously, the only time i've done my business squatting was out in the field during my 7 day field camp.

 

Anyways, bad picture aside, i can't believe how slack arty is compared to my previous life in OCS. Although i was told that this was about to change, i can't help but feel a bit uneasy when we were given like 4 hours of free time with nothing to do. My instructor in arty told me "just get gold for your first physical test here, then you can grow fat in arty happily." hahaha, sadly, it's kinda true, seeing how we use our brains to fight rather than our bodies. But i will make a personal promise to keep fit and healthy during my training here in arty.

 

Sadly, and with much surprise, i'm to fly to Brunei for jungle training this friday. It's too fast! I'm not mentally prepared! Ahh!!! >.< Normally, i thought that i'll be going on the 9th of November, which is when the infantry are going. But i guess arty works on a different time table.... I must admit that i am apprehensive about going there, although i heard that it's as fun as you want it to be. Well, i guess i could get use to the giant crocodiles, man-eating monkeys and poisonous vegetation so thick that you can hardly see the sky... *nervous laughter*

Well, i'll be gone on the 6th until the 16th of October, so you won't be getting any updates (at the moment) during this time; unless i happen to find an internet cafe in a treehouse somewhere in the middle of the jungle. XD

Praise God! I was on the list to be drafted from infantry to artillery. So on monday, i have to report to Khatib Camp instead of OCS for 21 weeks. After which, i'll report again to OCS for my last 3 weeks of training before i commission.

 

I was told to bring/buy a scientific calculator with trigonometric functions and coordinate conversion abilities. And i was like "er... what the heck is trigonometry?" seriously, i totally forgot everything i'd learnt during year 12 and so on. Oh well, let's see what they have in store for us.

 

Besides this news, the momentus occasion this week was my graduation from a junior to a senior cadet. It was meant to be a 23km route march during wednesday night at 11pm to thursday morning at 5am (no sleep at all), but i seriously think that it's more than 23km... Anyways, it was a painful but significant march as we sang army and pop songs to distract us from the pain as well as to kill time. It's amazing how long "Stand by Me" can go on with new lyrics being sung out of the blue while a few of us do the bass. (:D) At the end of it all, with my face and body literally covered in sweat, we stood at the base of Elephant Hill, a 60-70m high hill that was our last stretch to conquer. It was a steep climb, but we made it through with determination written on each of our faces. With every step i took, i growled at the pain in my ankles which was injured due to a streneous run a few weeks before. Denying the fatigue and jolts of pain everywhere on my body, i finally reached the top of the hill and took part in the ceremonial parade which was held just as the sun peaked out over the horizon. How proud we all felt when we marched down the hill with our new ranks (3 strips now) while our instructors and platoon commanders clapped and cheered for us. We felt as if we could do almost anything! Which was put to the test again when we were told to march back to OCS. Overall, i believed we had marched for 27-28km in total that day. As we marched into the camp, the junior cadets were lined up alongside the road and were clapping for us as well as we marched in with our heads held high. If we got this high during this, i wonder how estatic i would feel during the commissioning parade...

 

Lately, my free time is being demanded by a lot of people. Which is ok by me, but i can't help but feel frustrated as more and more responsiblities are being asked of me. I mean, i know that this is what the future would hold for me, especially when i'm training to be a Platoon Commander in OCS. I guess it's a way of preparing myself for what's in store for me. But i can't help but feel drained in a way, looking to God helps heaps, but how i wish i could just lie down on a grassy field in the shade with Jessica Alba cuddling up next to me while i just look up and watch the clouds go by, not really caring about how long i can stay there before i have to leave for the next appointment, or meeting, or my daily massage by Steph Song in a bikini of my choice.

 

Lol, man, i'm talking about my retirement now?! Army does weird things to me! LOL!

Happy, yet sad...

Content, yet yearning for more...

Calm yet confused...A smile and a sigh...

A laugh and a tear...

All these emotions, these feelings, seemed jumbled up inside of me. It's like there's a battle being waged within me everyday, trying to claim victory over the other side. Yet the good always triumphs over evil, right?

I'm optimistic by nature. My friends had pointed that out to me, and i don't disagree. Not many things can shake me and leave me depressed. I seem to be able to always see the silver lining in every dark cloud. And yet, i am still human. Sad, lonely, guilty, depressed. I hate these feelings. So much so that i do my best to avoid them at all costs. I mean, life is bad enough as it already is, right? So why should i give purposely put myself in any of these positions? Granted, some situations can't be help. But if given a choice, i'd siam (meaning avoid) them before they can even spot me.

Well, my section had a navigation exercise during both the day and night on tuesday. We were told to avoid using the roads and to bash our way through the forest towards our checkpoints. However, at night, we decided to stay close to the tracks in an effort to move faster because there was considerably less vegetation than if we were to travel further in. We finished our night navigation in record time, and as you can guess, the instructors suspected that we had cheated by using the roads instead of bashing. Cutting a long story short, my section (including me) was punished by having to write a two-page long essay stating "why we used the roads, what was the rationale of doing it, and what we should have done instead".

Anyway, on friday was my OCS Social Night. Each of us had to bring a partner along, and i invited Melissa along. (yes, i'd just realised that i know like, what, a total of 3 girls here in singapore... =_=) I had a lot of fun, considering that this would be my 3rd "formal" dinner in my life. Got to know a few of my friends' girlfriends/dates/classmates/ex-girlfriend (i'm serious! my bunk buddy brought his ex along!) and although i never said hello, one of my friends brought his mother along (hmm... don't think i wanna know). There was a video, some games and a few speeches. The most interesting bit was the lucky draw because Melissa won the 9th prize, which was an eye massager. And i won the 3rd prize, which was a Samsung Digimax A503 digital camera. Lol, it's kinda funny because i was considering getting a digital camera to take pictures and post them on my blog, but most of them was too expensive for me to buy, and i wanted a good quality one if i were to buy one. I guess God heard me and decided to give me an early birthday present. :P Or it could be a normal blessing and my birthday present is yet to come! :D

I only took a few pictures that night (trying to figure out how to work the darn thing...), but you can now expect more pictures flying around in my blog now! ^_^

Days turn to weeks... weeks turn to months.. soon, the months would turn to years.. how fast time flies to me! It seems like only a few weeks when i first set foot on singapore, but in truth, it has been 9 months! And i'm a 7-month-old soldier in the army. Still a newb, but army standards, but at least i'm not as naive anymore...

 

Platoon live firing. About the same as my Section live firing, only this time, it was more of a mission. Assault the enemy entrenched on a hill. Not too difficult. Being a section commander, i had the honour of igniting a powerful explosive that would breach the enemy's defensive barb wires so that the rest of my platoon can assault the objective. Do i feel honoured? A bit, although i didn't really feel much. Have i become hardened to army life? Dunno. But the army does weird stuff to us guys... something about sweat, loud noises, rain, mud and having seen no cute girls for so long changes normal, level-headed boys (if you can call them normal...) into primal-grunting, club swinging (rifle swinging, in our case), me-tarzan-you-jane thinking men. Actually, now that i think about it, i'm glad that no girls were around to see how primitive guys can be.

 

Anyways, where was i? Oh yes: boy, how time flies!

 

I'm still waiting whether i'll be posted to artillery or infantry. What's taking them so long?! Ok, so they're reviewing my performance and seeing if i'm suitable for the posting, but i'm a bit annoyed when i always have to say things like "Do i get to see you if i get posted to artillery?" (to my friend who is training to be a sergeant in artillery)

 

....

 

Well guys, for those of you waiting for new photos of my army life, please be patient for a while longer. I'm trying to get them off my friends, but it'll take a while before i can post them up. But i'll be sure to let you know when it's up!

Well, so far, another week goes by. I've just came back from my platoon field camp, where we learnt how to fight as a platoon. (boy, is it confusing @_@) I felt sorry for my friend who was the platoon commander, having to coordinate 27 men in a fight. One highlight was me being the machine gunner, and even though i only fired blanks and the mg was freaking heavy (+10kg), i had an adrenaline rush when i fired 200+ rounds at the enemy.

 

Hmm... other than this, i can't remember anything else interesting... everything seems to be a blur to me nowadays...

 

Anyways, tmr i'll be firing real rounds instead of blanks. I won't be the machine gunner, but i'll be a section commander instead. Not bad considering the fact that i'll be igniting another explosive (whose particulars i can't type due to security reasons. Know anymore and i'll have to kill you)